01 Jan 2009

The Raptors New Years Resolutions

Adams – get a sleeve for the other arm.

Bargnani – start shooting left handed.

Bosh – get the hell out.

Calderon – pass out Red Bull’s at half-time.

Colangelo – hire Messina.

Gheradini – get monogrammed cuff-links.

Graham – tie my shoelaces with a double knot.

Humphries – tea bag Voshkul.

Jawai – start going to Lucy’s for breakfast.

Kapono – swap wives with Jaric for a week.

Moon – veneers.

O’Neal – keep my hands to myself.

Parker – remain strong and invest in a pair of tweezers.

Solomon – start swallowing.

Triano – come back as an assistant for the ‘09-’10 season.

Ukic – wear my sideburns like Jose.

Voshkul – continue swallowing.

9 Raps

  1. Dino Gunner says:

    hahahahahhaha, that was quality raps fan, good stuff.

  2. AltRaps says:

    nailed adams.

    jawai’s lacked…heart.

  3. Is your New Year’s Resolution to become more and more juvenile with each post?

    If so, your first one of 2009 was a complete success.

  4. Dick Richardsen says:

    what the fuck was that post – this site has been brutal the last few days. The majority of basketball fans in this city are fucking clueless.

  5. mark says:

    Ha! I needed that. A steady dose of humour is required to follow this depressing team.

    Dick Richardsen – lighten up?

  6. drizz says:

    lol that was great. nice one raps fan.
    some people #3 & #4, need to get a sense of humour.
    if you can’t laugh about the mess that is the raptors, then keep crying.

  7. Time Intact says:

    “Humphries – tea bag Voshkul.” – HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!! That was brilliant.

  8. Dinosty says:

    Dick,

    We’re allowed a bit of a vacation too, aren’t we?

    Also, your name’s Dick. Sorry ’bout that.

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